I, Dr. Splatterjacket, will tell you one thing that never happens in my Journey-to-the-Center-of-the-Earth™ Mine: Rain.
This is both a blessing and a tragedy. On one hand, no floods, no soggy explosives, no wet socks. On the other hand, it means I almost never get to use my latest and greatest invention: The Chalkbrella.
At first glance, the Chalkbrella looks like a standard umbrella. And yes, it works as an umbrella. But let me ask you this: does your umbrella have a built-in chalk storage system hidden in the handle?
No. No, it does not.
You know the frustration. You’re strolling through the park, casually sketching an intricate pavement masterpiece, perhaps a detailed geological map or a doodle of your greatest enemy Zargoid 5 falling into a lava pit, when suddenly… rain.
Your artistic masterpiece, gone in seconds. Tragic.
But with Chalkbrella, you hold up your umbrella, shielding your art from destruction! Problem solved. Genius unlocked.
And there’s more.
The outside of the Chalkbrella is a chalk-friendly surface. Want temporary art? Scribble all over the umbrella itself. When it rains, voilà! Instant, self-erasing creativity!
The Chalkbrella is excellent and has hardly any flaws. Ok I admit, if you close the Chalkbrella too fast, the chalk dust may fly into your face, making you cough and giving you an unfortunate dandruff look. But what’s a little airborne chalk dust compared to UNSTOPPABLE ARTISTIC FREEDOM?
Stop losing your best pavement drawings to rain, stop wishing your umbrella could double as a portable art supply vault and get your Chalkbrella today!
Note to self: Order more chalk. Colouring in every single pavement crack has depleted our supply.
